In the shoe aisle

Why do my harmless little trips to the “bulls-eye store” end up being an episode on I Love Lucy? Okay, I flatter myself, I’m not as funny as Lucy.

The other night I went to the “bull’s-eye” store (secret code) to pick up some party stuff for my son’s school. As I was walking by the shoe area, I noticed some cute ballet-style shoes. I’ve actually tried some of these shoes on before, and they feel like you are putting your foot in cardboard. Nevertheless, I decided I needed to try again–I was lured by the price.

I decided to just slip one on while I was standing. I took my boot off and slipped on the cardboard shoe. All of a sudden my calf started cramping, and I fell to the floor in pain. I felt so stupid, but I was in so much pain I could do nothing but roll around between the shoe aisles trying to get the cramp to stop. If that wasn’t bad enough, then I started getting dizzy. I immediately started thinking that maybe it wasn’t a cramp but a blood clot, and that I was having a heart attack. I knew there was probably something I should do, and moving my arms up and down sounded right. So, I started raising my arms and trying to get up.

After the headlines on the news went through my head (“Lady has heart attack trying on shoes in store”), my leg stopped cramping. I looked around to see if anyone was laughing, and was relieved that I didn’t see anyone. Of course my husband pointed out that security was probably got a good laugh out of it. Oh, yeah the hidden camera.

So I limped around the store, and knocked over some cereal boxes. I then decided that my shopping needed to be over. I headed for the cash register and managed to drive myself home without any medical problems. 

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6 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Jenna
    Nov 01, 2007 @ 16:19:59

    Whoa…you’re dangerous to shop with. Charley horse, eh? I get those bad in pregnancy.

  2. Theresa
    Nov 02, 2007 @ 05:02:09

    Okay, I’m still rolling on the floor, but not from a cramp. So, can you do the Vitameatavegamin comercial?

  3. Luisa
    Nov 06, 2007 @ 13:46:37

    Oh, how awful! I’m impressed that you didn’t limp to the door immediately.

  4. Debbie
    Nov 07, 2007 @ 06:43:36

    You just crack me up rj!

  5. max
    Nov 15, 2007 @ 15:17:00

    You know you will do it again, right? Sure, right now, the chagrin will keep you away from those darling low priced little cardboard monstrosities, but with time that will fade and you will be lured again….

  6. rjlight
    Nov 16, 2007 @ 17:13:24

    Jenna — I used to get those when I was pregnant too — NO I’m not…

    Theresa — Actually, sometimes I feel like me life is one vitameatablegimananla commercial and I’m no big drinker!

    Luisa — hey, when a leg cramp gets you down, you pick yourself right up and walk to the cereal aisle

    Debbie — glad I could be of assistance

    Max — you know it, I will be lured again…

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