Tired?

I have to admit it, I’m feeling this blog is a bit tired. I feel as though my writing has gone down hill. I’m torn between two blogs, feeling like a fool…

I remember when I first started this blog back in 1995…okay, a year and so ago. My first posts were such a rush. I was so excited to be writing and feeling this excitement that people I didn’t know would be reading my blog. And then when the first comments came it was also a thrill. Then I went through the “why am I blogging stage?” and…okay, I still go through those moments. I’ve gotten tired. Unlike those first few posts where there was excitement to see if any one read my words, now I am looking to see how many people read my posts and rating my writing on the response. The excitement is gone and I’ve gotten off track.

I started blogging because I wanted to write. I still love writing. What I don’t love is checking out job postings for bloggers and writers that pay .02 a word. I realize that it used to be a “penny for your thoughts”, so it has doubled, but that is crazy.

I also don’t like that writing can be tedious at times. Some times it is as if the words just pour out of my fingertips and other times I spend more time hitting the backspace key than anything else. I have a degree in accounting, so why can’t I just pound numbers all day and be done with it? Because, I still believe that I am suppose to write. Even if no one reads my words, even if people roll their eyes in my attempts to give someone a smile, no matter what, I am supposed to write. That is what I must focus on. Even when the rejection letters come in the mail, and my writing is far from entertaining, even then I must write.

(Bring up the music, dramatic ending, fade to black)

 

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6 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Nancy
    Apr 19, 2008 @ 06:21:22

    Do you feel your writing has “gone down hill” because you are unhappy with the quality of your writing, or because you don’t feel it’s leading you where you want to go?

  2. rjlight
    Apr 19, 2008 @ 17:32:34

    Nancy –that is a great question. I think it is a little of both. I am frustrated that I haven’t had more success with my writing, and I also feel as though my writing has become stale and tired –at least on my blogs.

  3. tobeme
    Apr 21, 2008 @ 10:20:58

    When it becomes a chore, it is time to take a break. Write when you feel the passion. Writing should never be forced.

  4. rjlight
    Apr 21, 2008 @ 10:35:30

    tobeme — I agree. I have been forcing it at times. Not fun.

  5. writetools
    Apr 21, 2008 @ 13:37:14

    I find that for every hour I spend writing, I have to at least match it with adventures…of the non-keyboard type. Right now I am in the honeymoon stage of blogging… I have instant art and audience… rewarding for a novelist who has neither. But I keep picking blogging over writing what I truly care about… my book… I even blogged about it 🙂 Hang in there, give yourself permission to relax, have fun with those who inspire you, encourage you… hang in there!

  6. rjlight
    Apr 22, 2008 @ 14:38:35

    writetools–
    That is great advice. I know I have a tendency to keep working when a rest and some fun is what I need. It is now the opposite with me–in that I would rather work on my other writing instead of blogging more of the time.

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